Divorce is not an easy thing to endure, regardless of which person you are in the relationship with. The event of divorce rates just under the death of a spouse as life’s most stressful. When you add children and changes in residence to it, divorce can be a challenging time for even the most supported of people. Other life-altering or significant events that cause trauma include natural disasters, serious accidents or illnesses, or the loss of a loved one or a job.
The Planning Phase
Given the weight of the decision and the power of the consequences, one should consider the impact before making hasty plans to divorce. During the initial planning phase, it could be of great benefit to interview a few of your top choices for an attorney. Not only will that give you some basic information to get you started. An expert attorney will point you towards other resources to provide additional support to help you during one of the most stressful times in your life. Choosing an attorney that is also a skilled mediator will also give you a leg up in having the team in place to encourage constructive, healthy communication with your spouse and family members throughout the process.
During this time, you will want to be gathering financial documents and other related records. If you have access to them all in an open divorce with cooperation, make a few copies of them so that each partner can have them along with your attorneys. If you are in a marriage where the divorce will be a surprise or your spouse will be very unhappy once they find out your plans to divorce, you may have difficulty obtaining all the records that you might need once they know. Make sure to get your financial ducks in a row before you file for divorce if you have the chance.
Considerations During the Process
Once you have engaged the services of an attorney that you feel comfortable with, there will be many other things to do before filing a divorce petition. With the guidance and expertise of your skilled lawyer providing the support and clarity for your case, you will have a lot of homework to do in preparation. Other things to consider during this time are your custody and property plans, including residences, debts, and assets.
Questions to ask are: Who will be the primary parent and who will be the secondary? Where will my children live, with whom, for how long, and with what vacations, summer, or weekend plans? Where will my children and I live? What belongings will I keep, and which ones will my spouse keep? Other kinds of things to do will include: Making sure you have proof of income and assets, establishing individual personal credit and bank accounts, and closing joint bank and credit accounts.
Contact S. DeBoer Today
S. DeBoer has over a decade of professional experience helping people get a divorce. From excellent meditation services to trial, Stephanie has the right touch. When it comes to supporting people during times of relational trauma, she understands how to maintain her composure even when the stakes are high to create a calm space within the storm. There is no reason you should have to go through such a trauma alone. Reach out for advice. We offer a no-obligation, fee-free initial consultation.
